Post by aaronjh on Jul 10, 2007 14:29:07 GMT -5
Don't read this. It's for RPs.
From season's end, Magic GM Aaron J. Haberman claims he had his eyes set on LaMarcus Aldridge. No, not because the 6'11, 240 pounder out of the University of Texas has a bodacious bod (he does). It's because of the skill set on this hunk of man (seriously, he could beef up a little, but wow!).
Aldridge dominated college basketball (eh, for this article's sake) before announcing his intention to join the BBS. Early reports raved about his athleticism and his hands. One report done by a Pistons assistant even raved curiously about his "two golden hams of ass cheeks and a smile that could melt anything but my boner." But I digress.
When the lottery rolled around, the balls bounced into New York's face, as they moved up a spot from their projected sixth pick. The whip came down on Haberman, whose Magicians were now picking sixth.
It seemed Aldridge's golden hams would slap around elsewhere. Mock drafts projected this talent to go within the first five selections of the draft, what with the value of a project big man who comes in as such a solid defender.
Then a miracle happened. Of course there are no miracles in simulated basketball leagues, but fuck off. Tyrus Thomas found himself wearing a Miami Heat jersey after he was selected third, shaking up mock drafts everywhere. Aldridge's golden hams were slipping through the cracks. How glorious for Orlando!
The top five went on to play out without Aldridge's name being called. How glorious for Orlando! The franchise, which is looking to depart with fucking everyone on its shitty roster, got its guy, and we're not dealing him, so blow me, Hernando!
From season's end, Magic GM Aaron J. Haberman claims he had his eyes set on LaMarcus Aldridge. No, not because the 6'11, 240 pounder out of the University of Texas has a bodacious bod (he does). It's because of the skill set on this hunk of man (seriously, he could beef up a little, but wow!).
Aldridge dominated college basketball (eh, for this article's sake) before announcing his intention to join the BBS. Early reports raved about his athleticism and his hands. One report done by a Pistons assistant even raved curiously about his "two golden hams of ass cheeks and a smile that could melt anything but my boner." But I digress.
When the lottery rolled around, the balls bounced into New York's face, as they moved up a spot from their projected sixth pick. The whip came down on Haberman, whose Magicians were now picking sixth.
It seemed Aldridge's golden hams would slap around elsewhere. Mock drafts projected this talent to go within the first five selections of the draft, what with the value of a project big man who comes in as such a solid defender.
Then a miracle happened. Of course there are no miracles in simulated basketball leagues, but fuck off. Tyrus Thomas found himself wearing a Miami Heat jersey after he was selected third, shaking up mock drafts everywhere. Aldridge's golden hams were slipping through the cracks. How glorious for Orlando!
The top five went on to play out without Aldridge's name being called. How glorious for Orlando! The franchise, which is looking to depart with fucking everyone on its shitty roster, got its guy, and we're not dealing him, so blow me, Hernando!
